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Eight Dates

John Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman, Doug Abrams and Rachel Carlton Abrams

Strengthen your relationship through 8 meaningful conversations that deepen trust, navigate conflict, and align your future together.

17 min8 Chapters
Eight Dates

Listen to the intro

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Outline

What's it about?

Eight Dates (2019) offers couples a simple plan for building a stronger relationship: eight structured conversations, each held on a special date. Based on decades of research on thousands of couples, the book guides partners through essential topics such as trust, handling conflict, work and money, family, fun, personal growth, and shared dreams. Each date includes clear questions that help couples understand each other more deeply.

Key ideas

  • The book gives couples a simple plan: eight structured conversations, each held on its own special date.
  • The plan draws on decades of research on thousands of couples.
  • The dates cover trust, handling conflict, work and money, family, fun, personal growth, and shared dreams.
  • Each date comes with clear questions that help partners understand each other more deeply.
  • Talking through these topics on purpose can build trust and help partners line up their future together.

About the author

John Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman, Doug Abrams and Rachel Carlton Abrams bring together research, therapy, and writing. The Gottmans are American psychologists famous for their research on relationships and co-founders of the Gottman Institute. Doug Abrams is an author and editor who co-wrote The Book of Joy, and Rachel Carlton Abrams is a physician who focuses on family and integrative medicine.

Questions people ask

What is Eight Dates about?

Eight Dates is a plan for building a stronger relationship through eight structured conversations, each held on a special date. The topics include trust, conflict, work and money, family, fun, personal growth, and shared dreams.

Who is Eight Dates for?

It is written for couples who want to understand each other more deeply and talk through the essential parts of life together. Each date has clear questions to guide the conversation.

How long is the Durar summary of Eight Dates?

The Durar summary takes about 15 minutes to read or listen to. It covers the book's plan of eight conversations and the main topics each one explores.

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